Cherating... and Bali again!

Imagine this. A thirty plus makcik with a miserable looking hair; tied loosely with most of her hair strands sticking out rather than being held in place. The oily face dull without any lipstick on. She wears her usual t-shirt and pants; both had been used over their life span. Boleh imagine? That's me; dengan rupa yang sangat tak menyelerakan; desperately longing for another vacation...hahhaa. Sangat tak sedar diri, kan?


I went to Cherating with my parents and adik lelaki. The trip was supposed to be with PK, tapi disebabkan pompuan itu masih berpoya2 kat obersi nun, maka automatically kupon hotel tu bertukar hak milik...haha.

Apa lagi yang lebih best selain dari kopi Haipeng. That's the main reason of the visit anyway. Dah lama sangat mengidam nak minum kat haipeng ni. I also went to 'Bulan'...tapi kan PK, tutup! Cehh...sampai hati dia tutup. We end up having dinner kat kedai ntahapa2 je, and went to bed early. Sangat2 tak best. There's nothing much to do at the beach, walaupun berkali2 kitorang round kat pantai cherating tu. Musim ombak tengah tinggi. Even tak tinggi pun, i never planned to mandi manda anyway. Nothing much memorable about the trip. Is it because i was with my parents? Tak jugak...although i admit that i would've been on a different holiday mood dengan different company. Is it because the trip was too short? Tak jugak kot...sebab other than haipeng, i seriously do not have any specific plans. But we went until kuala kemaman, beli kopok bagai and lalu kuantan on the way back to KL sebab CikguMat nak cari benda2 kereta dia.


The only reason i can think about is... kepala ni asyik ingat Bali lagi kot. Now i understand what PK had said before about being in another place after spending your time at Bali. You tend to carry the same mood, but somehow your expectation will be too high...that sort of feeling. ishhh...susah nak explain. Different people would have different opinion about that place. I have few friends who didn't even enjoy their trip to Bali. I'd like to think that i'm such a lucky person to have that wonderful experience. And i'm pretty sure that my travel companions pun share that same feelings. ohhh...my ♥ is still in Bali!


p/s : sesapa nak pegi Bali beli la lulur dia...best ;P

Bali

I was a little bit skeptic when the time came for me to go to Bali. Not because of the place, but because of the company. One person whom i've known for few years, but without any experience pergi bercuti2; and another person whom i've never met and have not even talk over the phone whatsoever. Surprisingly, i got along well with the 'stranger', instead of my own friend who at times seems very clingy and most of the time have different taste and opinion.


I am very particular with whom i spend my time with. I don't just randomly go out with anyone, especially to spend few days with that person. PK had always been my travel mate all this while. Sekarang adalah sangat sukar nak bercuti bersama2 since we had our own FCs to worry about. Especially me. So, I had to find other alternatives nowadays...and, bringing all the FCs is not an alternative ye.


Bali was really wonderful. I have nothing but good memories about the place. The culture, people and wonderful architecture amazed me. I knew right from the beginning that it's worth arguing with my friend about the tour guide. Never mind tak pernah pergi, but, at least listen to someone (yang jugak tak pernah pergi!) albeit your friend ni sorang pompuan yang nampak gaya macam tak tau apa2... but hey, perempuan ni rajin baca review, forum bagai tau! So, that's the stress all about before going. Luckily it ended and was left behind at the airport.


The days were spent dengan jayanya. The moment that 'stranger' stepped into the car on the first day was the first time we met and talk... and, we were no more stranger after that. Infact i was lucky that that there were three of us instead of two. I sendiri pun heran macamana kepala kitorang boleh sama. We had brunch at Mekdi, bought DankinDonat, spent time at kedaiBatuKeras, had same taste over paintings & carvings ...and neither one was of my friend's interest. That 'stranger' really saved my holiday.


I've uploaded some photos to my flickr. Nak tengok carik la seniri ye. I'm certainly going there again. I've pictured myself ambik cuti sebulan & spend my days over there; of course without any worries about the FCs...hmmmm. I truly love that place!

saya takde supir sekarang...

First time PK and me were separated ever since we knew each other was when she was assigned to Trondheim for two months. That was about errr...entah tahun bila? We were never separated that long before. At that time i was working at Kampar. I was left to take care of our FCs, which at that time was countless... our few cats, plus EncikD's cat who at that time was sick, plus the cats we fed outside our house, and also the cats outside my office. told you.....countless! They have different kind of foods, meaning i have to go to different places to get them. At that time, all the supplies came from Ipoh, about an hour drive from Kampar.


It was really challenging for me to cope with things at that time. I was often emotionally drained; i was grumpy most of the time. With my very limited ability to remember places and routes and ohhh...there were no GPS at that time ye...so, i had a map with me in the car. I also had a white board hung at the kitchen where i listed the dates when i bought which kind of food, so that i won't forget to replenish the supplies.


It was one of the period in my life that i wish not to be repeated. There were too many things at that time. Too many unpleasant things to be remembered. EncikD was sick at that time. I made an effort to visit him every wednesday night and saturday afternoon, although not as frequent as PK who visited him every single day from KL; but i do hope my presence at that time did cheer him a bit.


I lost Jebat about a week before PK came back from Norway. I am still sad. It was truly my fault letting him play outside with Poh. I lost both of them. I remembered buying watermelon to share with Jebat (dia memang makan buah) and when he didn't come back, i didn't even dare to look or throw the watermelon away, hoping so much that he'll come back. I still miss him. I lost many kittens at that time. Mostly because of flu. I couldn't cope with so many kittens at that time, and taking them to clinic was quite difficult since the nearest clinic is also at Ipoh. I still blame myself, i still hope i had done more to help them. I lost Lily, a beautiful black and orange soft furred kitten. I went to the clinic and asked for flu pills for her, with her exact age and weight. Her head was tilted the next day after i gave her the pills. She had epilepsy. I googled, joined an online support group because i didn't know what to do at that time. After about a couple of weeks, she passed away right after i prayed to God to take her away. It was a very emotional moment. I couldn't stand seeing her with so much pain. I still blame myself; the caused of the epilepsy was overdose. i should've brought her to the clinic.


I was very lonely at that time. I lived in Kampar alone; no friends around me, no colleagues nearby except for a chinese colleague who stays 10 km away. I had to depend on myself. I was lucky to have the FCs around. Poi never failed to accompany me to the office every midnight because that's the only time i can skype with PK. I felt guilty going back to KL leaving the FCs at Kampar. There were too many decisions to be made alone. I had to reorganize myself; which day to go where, which bills to be paid, which route to take; i had to be independent, and it was hard at that time since i was pretty much depending on PK to remind me of many things.


Now, after entah berapa tahun; PK was assigned to Trondheim again. This time she has EncikD and BabySJ with her. I am a very different person now. Maybe the environment is different; i now live on my own, at my own place, and my parents and family is just minutes away from me. I know they'll be around if anything happens to me. i think i can manage being alone nowadays. I had stomach infection (which is what i deciphered from the doctor who spent less than 5 minutes with his patient) the next day after PK was gone which caused me to stay at home for three days. I didn't even go to my parents place and no one knew. i know i can handle myself now, and i'm very proud of it. Not a big deal for others, i know... but hey, a big improvement for me


Moralnya di sini : macam2mana sekalipun kita ni berdikari, we still need people around us... and macam2mana sekalipun kita bergantung pada orang lain, we have to make ourselves ready, because in the end... we'll still be alone.

Saya yang sakit belakang

So, I am the one...datang tak la awal but always among the earliest to go back. I kan duduk jauh, anak pulak lapan belas...susah tu. Do I feel guilty? Yes, sometimes. But most of the time I know that I did everything I needed to do, and I know I did my work fast.


Working with one old man is challenging...imagine working with two. Both have their own ideas. Yang tersepit orang yang kat tengah2 ni. I was asked by the new junior; kenapa A & B macam so and so... Ahha...observant jugak budak ni. While B tries to make A seems like the bad guy; A pulak chose to work his own way without saying anything about B to the young interns.


I think dealing with people is the hardest thing to do. Computers won't say anything bad about you, nor will it bark at you back. Habis teruk pun hang, which is what usually happen to me. Maklum la, who am I to get a super duper power machine kan... I tried to make most of what I have, remove the partitions & make use of the external hardisk; actions which required the 'hardwork' of our IT person, aka 'bos tipu' CikSecretary & PuanSH. And today, after installing a new programme..it happened again. My half day work was gone. Sapa suruh tak save kan. Adakah saya rasa nak mengamuk? Surprisingly no. I was frustrated, yes. Maklum la, it was my first time using that software, so I spent many hours menggodek and straining my eyes, but I managed to stay calm. I told my friends & I dapat makan sekeping pizza, and I continued doing the work again..hehe.


Now, while waiting for PK to pick me up at the bus stop, I wish I have more energy to clean the house, mandi etc. I jugak teringat yang I promised my sister to send her things to my parent's place...supposed to do it yesterday..nampak gayanya hari ni pun tak jugak la kot ni. Hmmm...and I wonder if my mirror will be delivered tonight? ...i'm feeling tired already just thinking about the messy home...

r a y a

So many things happen to people I know this ramadhan. A neighbour felt from a tree, broke his ribs, and passed away few days before raya. Another neighbour's daughter suddenly had terrible headache, admitted to hospital, one of her eyes popped out, and is still in coma. CikSecretary's husband was admitted due to dengue, and not long after that, she followed suit. My sister lost one of her cutest FC, Mona a few days before raya.


Ini la dugaan namanya. He doesn't test His umat unless he/she is capable of getting through it. I spoke to my neighbour, whose daughter is ill. He seems calm; redha for whatever is coming and at the same time hoping that the doctors would find a way to help his poor daughter, although it seems like there's not much room for discussions with them.


These things made me realize how lucky I am. I have all I wanted, things ran smoothly, everything seems easy for me. I'm really, really grateful, I'm blessed, I'm lucky. Tapi disebabkan dalam hati ni dah lama sangat setan bertapak kan, I still have qualms, I still question why things happened this way and not the way I wanted, and on..and on. I get upset when I coughs so much, when my calls wasn't answered, bila orang tak mintak maaf masa raya ni and so many other tiny, petty things. But above all that, I hope that He'll grant me with wisdom to think wisely, I hope that my path will still be as clear and smooth because I know that I'm not quite a strong person.



Please forgive me for all my wrongdoings. Happy Raya, all!

s o m e o n e l i k e y o u

update sebelum puasa

Pernah tak dapat invitation & you had to decline for certain reason? Ohhh... i do that all the time. But, pernah tak dapat invitation makan2 & you had to decline, and you mintak pulak orang yang ajak tu buat balik makan2 tu next time untuk you?


See? That's why i ni anti-KpgJagung. Ce imagine kalau orang ajak gi kenduri kahwin & kita tak boleh nak pergi; takkan la kita nak orang tu postpone kenduri kahwin dia semata2 sebab kita tak boleh nak attend. Takkan la jugak kita nak suruh orang tu buat makan2 lain untuk kita sebab kita takde masa kenduri tu. Takkan la orang semua kena ikut availability kita baru boleh nak plan.... kannnn?


Okay, enough with the KpgJagung stuff. I was away for five days last week for a fieldtrip (again!) at Langkawi. I didn't get to do much shopping though; just few hours in between errands which i spent time to get PK's pinggan mangkuk Korel itu..memang i pun takde apa nak dibeli pun. Nasib baik i ni cepat jugak menangkap corak daun hijau yang dia dok berkenan tu. Maybe next time i nak pergi lagi la, saje jalan2. I find it quite interesting jugak; tak banyak kereta, jalan pun takde la sampai nak sesat2 sangat; lagipun apa la gunanya gps & peta kannn, unless you are under extreme pressure macam kitorg hari tu. Mana nak ingat jalan, bawak pulak slow macam siput, bawak laju sikit orang belakang tertinggal; lambat sampai tempat makan komplen pulak; makan tak cukup komplen jugak; lapar sikit tak boleh, share katil tak boleh... ishhh... i can go on and on kalau nak pok pek pasal rakyat KpgJagung ni. Anyway, i hope that's the last trip for me. I hope to manage from opis only; idak le akak yang dah tua ni kena melayan uolls tu adik2 KpgJagung oiii...


My downstairs neighbor knocked at the door just now, with a cat. I saw that cat on the staircase this morning. I knew that she wanted me to take in the cat. Masalahnya kak oiii...i already have 18. I know adding another one won't make any difference. But, adding a new cat to the family will take time, and it'll cause a tense environment among the existing anti-social society. I'll be at work during day time, macamana la i nak monitor supaya depa semua tak gaduh. Yang ada sekarang ni pun asyik gaduh je. hmmm...i hope the cat's gonna be okay. Although the cat cuma lalu je sekejap kat luar pintu, i tau Poi syak something. She's been staring & sniffing at the door dari tadi. Macamana la i nak percaya dia takkan buat apa2 kat budak kecik tu nanti... Sekarang dia dah terlentang nak tido betul2 kat depan pintu sambil muka dia mengendap ikut bawah lubang pintu...ayoook. Maybe it's about time that we educate people; mungkin dari sekolah lagi patut ajar kot. Animals are makhluk tuhan jugak; no matter in what form they are born. We should educate dari baby lagi kot, cuba sayang binatang. I don't blame akak nyonya bawah tu; at least dia ada rasa kesian kat kucing tu. Cuma i hope people like her will try to take the responsible jugak. Cuba jangan harapkan orang lain untuk jaga. We ourselves have to take part. Idak le asyik2 antar kucing ramai2 kat orang yang dah memang ada banyak kucing. No, i'm not talking about myself here. I'm saying this on behalf of many people out there. Memang kita tak kesah nak jaga, but isn't it better kalau ada lebih ramai yang boleh jaga kucing2 terbiar ni?


Sesambil menulis ni, i'm watching a drama at channel indon. Ni semua angkara my mother who keeps texting me menyuruh i tengok citer tu. Biasa la drama2 seberang ni, slow semacam je kadang tu. But, one thing i like about this drama is about the character; cakap lemah lembut, sopan, sabar, marah pun tak tinggi2 suara... kapan dong mau jadi kayak gitu???


Ok le...next time sambung balik. Selamat berpuasa ye!

kadang2 kita kena jugak berangan...

Kata orang, seronok kalau kerja boleh jalan2 ni...tak la terperap kat opis je. Itu kata orang. Kata orang yang kerja dia kena duduk atas kerusi sambil ketip2 keyboard. Maybe i'd say the the same thing if i were in their shoes. Well, actually, i do hope i am in their shoes.


I envy everyone who is lucky enough not to have to work outdoor. Not that i hate outdoor things; i ni bukan la lembik sangat rasanya. But, i've been working under the hot sun for years. Dari zaman belajar, sampai i dah kerja almost 14 years; asyikkk la kena berjemur. Bukan la i ni mengada2 takut hitam ke apa; dah memang gelap pun; masalahnya i think i've had enough. Itu je. Is it so hard for people to understand that? Can't they imagine how restless i can be because of the heat? I'm not young anymore, and i know my body is not capable to tolerate the weather as much as i can when i was younger. I don't think they can imagine how uncomfortable i can be when the heat is trapped inside me, how my face feels burning all the time. Sangat2 tak selesa tauuuu!!!


I've been thinking a lot lately...agaknya sebab sekarang ni jiwa tengah kusut sebab ada fieltrip tak lama lagi kot. I think i should stop doing things that i don't like. I think i should focus on things yang boleh buat hidup ni lebih meaningful, something different. Macam kahwin??? ...hahaha...habis la, PK mesti tengah kata i gila tu. Seriously, if money is not an issue, and hiring a pet sitter is not a problem at all...then i think i'll spend most of my time traveling. Kan PK kan...we would've gone to Landen this week and NiuZilen next week, and off to some weird sounding country somewhere in the middle of the Mediterranean Sea the other week. Gila best gitu kan... i tau me_cnor mesti tengah sengih imagine2 ni kan? But then again; i don't think there's anyone i can trust enough to leave the FCs with, except for PK and my siblings. Itu pun, kalau boleh i want them to stay at my place so that they won't miss anything & the FCs doesn't feel abandoned. Sangat cerewet kannn??? Takpe...takpe... i'll work that out when the time comes...wahahahahaaaa


Seriously, i know i have lots of leaves to be finished by end of the year. Except for the few days plan nak berpoya2 hujung tahun ni; yang lain i langsung tak tau nak buat apa. Nak ambik cuti raya panjang2 pun buat apa? Makcik2 kat KL ni the first day raya dah abis dah. Itupun dah campur setengah hari terbongkang depan tv tengok drama2 raya. What else can i do? Adakah i patut ambik cuti & pergi kursus2 motivasi? Shall i go to baking classes and hope that one day i can earn my living memukul telur instead of menukul batu? Or, should i just wait until end of year, take leave, and just stay at home...as usual? Most likely that's the best option. But meanwhile, i should think of something different than the usual routine wake up-eat-'tescoing'/'gianting' etc. Maybe i should get back to my old hobby; that pencil and drawing paper thing? But first; i should put a reminder to myself to make my house as comfortable as i could so that i won't find any excuse to spend my time outside. Err...PK, cancel the spa thingy, i think i'd like a new house for my birthday present next year, bleh?

kek resepirahsia

I received a message from a client at KampungJagung; "En T kata, boleh tak bawak kek ResepiRahsia sebijik dua untuk refreshment masa meeting". We were supposed to have a meeting/briefing with a group of rakyat KampungJagung next week. I couldn't help but grin. Kalau i duduk kat tempat dia (the messenger), what would i do? My boss suruh mintak orang yang nak datang meeting bawak makanan. Not just any makanan, specifically stated cake. Not just any cake, kek ResepiRahsia. I think i would faint in embarrassment. Mungkin kalau i tak sayang duit at that time, instead of menjatuhkan maruah (exaggerate tak?) i would rather buy the cake myself. I'm not putting the blame on the messenger. I knew that the instruction came from the boss. I totally understand that as a junior, siapalah kita nak membantah kata2 tok ketua kita. The blame should be put on the tok ketua.


It reminded me of the days when i was working in a different job sector before. I've worked both for the 'kuli' company which is a contractor and also for the 'boss' company, also known as the consultant. It's a totally different scenario. Working as a contractor buat kita sentiasa sedar diri, selalu kena hormat pada consultant. When i say hormat, it goes to the extend bagi sesetengah orang sampai membodek & memberi apa2 shj yang consultant nak. Working as a consultant pulak boleh buat sesetengah orang besar kepala. Mintak la apa saja, biasanya contractor akan cuba jugak bagi so that consultant boleh sign & kerja boleh jalan dengan lancar. Bagi sesetengah consultant, asking for favour which includes money is just peanut. Apatah lagi setakat nak suruh belanja makan.


For me, it's the same situation dengan rakyat KampungJagung. They have the mindset that they are the boss. Buat la apa sekalipun, salah la macamana sekalipun... they are always right. They are taught by the tok ketua that asking favours from the kuli is not wrong. I pity the freshgraduates. Baru nak belajar hidup bekerja, kepala dah disogok pulak dengan anasir2 negative macam tu. No wonder they have attitude problems. No wonder diorang berlagak.


I've asked PK the other day if we will be just like one of them kalau dari dulu2 kami bekerja di KampungJagung. PK said that she don't think we'll change. We'll just be like mc#1; despite sifat2 cerewet dia tu, i do respect him for being humble. I know that it is unfair to label all of them macam tu. My friends (i only have a few friends at KampungJagung) are all nice peoples. It all depends pada kita sendiri. How we think, how we were brought up and how/what we choose to be. Till this moment, i realise i'm not a suitable candidate to be rakyat KampungJagung; even otherwise, i know i should choose not to be.

spa

I promised me_cnor to update belog, pagi2 buta hari isnin dia dah tuntut dah...ayooo!

So, i went for a BalineseTheraphy spa last saturday. It's a birthday gift. Thanks to PK, i enjoyed it so very much. I went there alone guided by my gps yang lebih mengconfusekan i yang memang lembap ni. I have to find a way to hack the thing; takde la nanti kita dah buat u-turn, dalam map kata kita dok sebelah sana jalan lagi kan. Nasib baik mata ni masih cekap lagi. As i expected, parking memang agak payah kat area tu, i was lucky to get one a block away. Kira ok la tu. I arrived 15minutes late from my appointment. The place was nice and cozy. I was served with a drink while waiting three other ladies at the counter. The place is not so big but warm enough to let you enjoy the balinese deco and ambiance.

I was showed to the first room on my right along the hallway. The room was dimmed, soft balinese music in the background and the smell of aromatheraphy oils and candles was everywhere. The session started with whole body scrubbing. Since this is my first time, i rasa teruk la jugak kot kerja therapist tu. Bayangkan la dah berapa lama kuman2 tu semua melekat kat badan ni...ishh. But the best part was the massage. I have been complaining endlessly about having backache these couple of weeks, so that massage was truly, truly an indulgence.

The whole process was about 1.5hours where most of the time was spent on the massage. Kuat jugak la orang yang kerja macam ni kan, because i know i couldn't even massage my own arms more than 10minutes. The process ended when she tapped softly on my shoulder and told me to have a few minutes rest. Hmmm...kalau boleh i nak je suruh dia sambung lagi...hehe. Takpe la, next time boleh buat lagi... So PK, next time bagi la lagi hadiah macam tu ye!

nurkasih

Tanpamu





I watched NurKasih last Saturday. My friends warned me that it's a sad movie. Another friend even texted me to remind me to bring tissues along. Yes, i held on to a tissue throughout the whole movie. Just in case.


My comments :

1. Tak banyak movie melayu yang i tengok. I pernah tengok Fenomena which was my first movie outing with friends. At that time the ticket was $2 (belum guma RM lagi time tu). Others were Abang92 (ye ke 92?), Ringgit Kassorga (tertengok dua kali!), Cinta which is a very sweet movie; and of course i have to watch NurKasih after following the series religiously. I don't like the crowd when watching malay movies. The ladies beside me tak habis2 bagi komen; from beginning to the end of the movie. Another man one seat away from me had loud and smelly breathing...bolehh? The air and surrounding mood was not encouraging enough for me to go deep into the movie.

2. I thought Aidil was a strong person. Sangat cool in every aspect. But he disappointed me. I don't think that he should be so distressed when his wife passed away. Dia kan sangat tabah gitu...

3. Why did Adam had to go and find the lost wedding ring? Sangat tak logik nak cari cincin tengah2 padang pasir. Cincin hilang dalam rumah pun bagai nak gila nak cari, ini kan pulak padang pasir...padang pasir, occay! Beli je la cincin baru kannn.

4. I don't think it's that easy nak tukar2 jantung. Nasib Adam memang betul2 baik la kan. The heart came exactly at the right time.

5. Adam macam kuda belang. Muka kelabu, tangan gelap.

6. Painting needs colours ye puan2. It doesn't work if the brush is dry.


Overall, the movie was ok. Sedih dari mula sampai habis. Of course it is not fair to compare dengan cerita2 omputih, kira ok la untuk cerita melayu. I still prefer Cinta though. Ohh...and i didn't use the tissue!

being a better person

Finally, i've finished watching 'eat pray love' last week although dah berzaman i donlod citer tu.  What triggered me to watch the movie is an article i saw in the newspaper.  That article got nothing to do about the movie but there was a photo of JuliaRobert at Bali and the writer pun cerita bukan main baik lagi pasal Bali...maka akak ni pun bukan main la lagi tergedik nak tengok citer tu.  It's a nice story.  A true story about the writer who travelled to Italy and spent her time eating, she went to India to find her spirituality and she found her love in Bali.  The sceneries are beautiful, especially the ones at Bali.  If only i can have a life as simple and live in a such beautiful place.


But life ain't always beautiful.  The roads are sometimes bumpy.  We don't know what's waiting around the corner.  I always remind myself to be prepared for the worst in anything i do.  Contohnya, don't be frustrated gila2 kalau masak and orang tak lalu nak makan (doesn't apply to me though!), jangan harap semua orang akan tepati janji or don't be extra nice to strangers, jangan berhentikan kereta walaupun dia terbaring terlentang tengah jalan sekalipun (i heard this from the radio!), you might end up being poorer or kalau nasib tak baik hilang kepala sekali.


There are many, many unexpected things in our life.  One day, when i was in form 3, ada la sorang kawan ni.. all of a sudden dia marah2 saying that i'm not as soft as she thinks i am.  I was stunned.  Dia kata i berlakon, macam lembut tapi sebenarnya tak.  I didn't know what to say.  I was clueless.  Tak paham langsung kenapa topik tu boleh keluar.  Now, after 23 years i can still remember that moment walaupun sampai sekarang i masih tak faham kenapa dia marah2 but, whatever she said leaves a very significant impact to me until today.  Now, I hate it so much bila orang kata i ni lemah lembut.  I'd just say "u belum kenal i lagi".  I've learned my lesson; jangan bagi orang expect lebih2.  There's no way u can please everyone.  I was being myself at that time.  I never thought myself as a soft spoken person, i never pretended to be anyone else; i was being me.  If a person interpreted me to be A, tapi i sebenarnya B; salah siapa?  Why do i get the blame for not being A padahal u sendiri yang pandai2 assume i ni A.  Anyway, she stopped talking to me for a few months.  Another close friend also stopped talking to me one day.  I might have done or say something to her.  I remember that moment clearly; i offered her my orange sebab memang i tak suka makan buah dari dulu, she declined the offer without saying a word.  She was my closest friend at that time.  We used to go to prep together every night.  Our friendship turned sour after that.  It was not until i worked at Perak that she texted me.  I didn't ask what happened before; don't know how to.  I can never know what happened because she passed away after about a year after she contacted me.  Whatever i did, i hope she forgave me.  Those are only two.  I'm sure i've hurt many others.  There's another one who also decided to stop being friends with me when i was in form 5.  She came to visit my friends and me when i was at uni, but i realised that she can't even look at my eyes.  I've decided not to be friends with her on pesbuk.  Apalah gunanya pun?  This is not anger nor revenge.  Friends on pesbuk are not real friends anyway.


See?  I'm not a good person.  I've done lots of mistakes.  I've hurt so many people.  No matter how much i reminded myself, it happened...must've been in my genes.  Although i've never had any serious resolutions before, tak kira la new year ke birthday ke; but deep inside i've never failed to hope that i'll be a better person.  Each year i hope that i'll never do or say anything that'll hurt anyone's feeling.  I know i've failed over, and over again and i know it's gonna happen again and again...  Although constant reminders of my behavior can destroy my self esteem yang tak seberapa ni, but i do hope to be reminded always.  I've tried to ignore my own feelings whenever i was hurt, believing that it's the requital for my bad behaviors.  No matter what i do, it's not that easy to get over with.


It's my birthday today.  I always add another year in advance, but today, i'm officially 38.  I humbly apologise for my past wrongdoings.  I'm tired of having so much flaws.  I know it has affected my life in many ways.  I hope not to hurt anyone anymore.  I still hope to become a better person.  Please help me to become one.

redang

   the beach, the colours, the sound...

this and that

I reached office at 7.20 this morning.  Setelah dihantar & ambik depan opis (bahagianya hidup...) oleh PK sejak2 dia mula bekerja (read : kerja maknanya duduk kat opis & end of the month dapat gaji ye...), semalam & hari ni kena memerah tenaga naik train balik sebab PK cuti.   I woke up at 5.10 am after the third alarm.  Paksa jugak bangun walaupun tengok Poi & Tam-Tam tido dengan sungguh nyenyak.  I tau dah, kalau buat lembik2 badan mesti tertidur sampai pukul 8 kot.  Pastu mula la meroyan, kalau boleh time tu la nak ada 8 tangan.  I ni termasuk kategori kanak2 kot.  Jarang sekali berjaya nak tido lambat unless ada benda nak buat yang boleh buat i leka.  Idak le seperti kawan i yang sorang tu... sanggup tunggu TasbihCinta pukul 1.28 am sebab heroin dia cun.  I ni, kalau le hero AbangNuar sekalipun, kalau dah cerita tu tengahmalam... babai je la.  Dulu2 time2 i, PK & EncikD selalu tengok wayang malam2, selalu la i tertido dalam panggung wayang tu, kena siku toksah kata la..  Rasanya most of the cerita tu mesti ada i terlelap kejap.  Sekarang ni partner tengok wayang i pulak species burung hantu, selagi cinderella tak bertukar pakai baju buruk, selagi tu la dia rasa macam pagi.  Terpaksa la i ni terkulat2 berjegil mata, sambil kejap2 kena jeling.

Setelah dibebel oleh PK petang semalam, maka malam tadi i pun join le mereka seme makan malam kat PizaHat.  Itu pun setelah i hentam beskut patsegi gula sebanyak 7 keping petang tu.  Mana la boleh tahan nak tunggu time makan diorang yang duduk timezone lain dari i ni.  Memandangkan i ni bekerja keesokan harinya, maka i pun meluncur la balik dulu; idak boleh le nak merewang2 bagai kat soping kompleks nun seperti mereka2 itu (penuh dengan perasaan dengki...).  Macam biasa, i ni ada habit suka bukak laptop dulu sebelum tido.  Kadang tu sempat bukak je, terus terlelap sampai pukul 4.  Ntah kenapa, mesti jaga pukul 4 kalau tak off laptop.  I pun bukak itu ini, sambil dengar lagu NurKasih yang Tiz nyanyi.  Tetiba nampak la mc#1 si burung hantu tu online.  Baru teringat yang kitorang ada date nak gossip2 online.  Terus la kami bergossip pasal 'bos' me_cnor yang katanya tak boleh lagi menjejakkan kaki kat tower nun.  Kepada me_cnor, kalau nak tau lebih lanjut sila buat appointment ye...hehe.  

Walaupun malam esok nak gi Redang, mood nak pegi tu macam kureng je... Hopefully takde la anasir2 jahat yang akan mengancam kegumbiraan kami nanti (Golumn???).  I haven't pack a thing.  It is sooo, very unlike me.  I ni jenis yang akan pack barang awal, seminggu awal pun pernah.  Kali ni satu benda pun tak buat, seluar ke mana, selipar tempat lain, ubat muntah etc...  Seriously, mood memang zilch.  i think i'm gonna spend my time tido dalam bilik je la kot...hehe




Tetiba rasa takde mood pulak nak sambung tulis.  Nanti2 je la i hapdate lagi ye.  Ini pun i tulis sebab dah tak larat nak baca message me_cnor yang pagi petang suruh hapdate.  Mentang2 la dia ada lambakan entry.  Selama ni yang kita dok tulis bertubi2 tu taknak pulak kira ye...  


Hokay la, nanti i buat entri gambar2 redang .....kalau rajin!

bestnya Tam-Tam tido ....

genting

I think the last time i went to Genting was when i was in primary school.  Ada la jugak lalu tapi tak pernah naik sampai atas.  After the wedding at home, i pun ikut la PK sekeluarga berpoya2 ke Genting.  This is our first trip together dengan SJ.   SJ langsung tak tau menahu, tapi kami yang beria2 bergumbira.

Macam biasa, the first thing i always do is to take photos of the room; ie sebelum bilik tersebut bersepah2.  The room is nice, the hotel is perfect, the weather is great.  Walaupun hujan sikit2 tapi overall semuanya ok, sebab our intention is not to terkinja2 dengan segala game yang ada.  But, we did take a ride on the cable car.  Itu pun setelah diberi kata putus oleh EncikD. Rupa2nya antara kami bertiga, dia yang paling gayat ye...hehe

Berjaya jugak kami ke ladang stoberi, walupun tak  berjaya memetik stoberi.  Malang sekali, takde pulak diorang jual eskrim stoberi macam kat Cameron tu. 

Itu je la kot aktiviti kami sepanjang dua hari tu.  oooo...lupa pulak. Kami ada sessi bershopping2.  Macam la kat KL ni takde kedai nak shopping kan... :-)

the wedding

the couples, the families, the guests & the cats :

 The house are full with my aunties & cousins since tuesday.  I add myself to crowd on thursday.  This is the time where everyone meets, everyone talking, gossips in the air.  My aunties sebelah mak are all 'kompangs'; so the house is full with their loud voices, laughter and yelling.
Everything went well though it rained heavily in the afternoon. Biasa la...apa2 event pun mesti ada benda yang tak kena kan. Pengantin terlambat, kerusi tak cukup, lupa bawak bunga manggar...whatever!  Both my sister and brother cuma beza dua tahun, they were born in the same hospital, ward sebelah menyebelah; coincident pulak wedding pun sekali.  Since there are two 'pengantins', so the family table had to be splitted into two; ada pulak la yang tak cukup tempat & komplen kata "saya tak puas hati...".  Awat makcik...tak boleh ka duduk kat meja biasa?  Most of the guests are my parents' friends.  I invited only few friends, well...not my wedding anyway kan, and errr... some invited their friends along.

Hmmm...so the cats had to be caged.  I thought of sending them for boarding, tapi tuan punya kata kesian...takut stress.  So, duduk la dua2 tu dalam banglow besi dua tingkat.  One of the reason why i proposed not to have the wedding at home is because of them, and of course the chaos, kena kemas rumah, orang ramai, stress sana sini, budak2 ramai, bising...etc.

the flowers, the music :

I love flowers. Walaupun CikguMat kata tak payah letak kat tangga, nanti susah orang nak pegang...i letak jugak! 
I was quite surprise jugak when CikguMat proposed to put on some music, of course dengan beberapa syarat... only certain kind of music allowed, and not too loud.  We downloaded gamelan music, orang yang jaga PA tu pulak degil, sibuk nak pasang lagu dia yang ntahapa2, kuat pulak tu... Moral, if someone pays you, he/she is the boss; so please listen :)

me :

As expected, i received lots of queries.  Most of them are answered with a smile.  Malas nak sembang panjang, nanti tension pulak orang yang tanya tu...hehehe.  I was prepared for all this, in fact i'm always prepared; so takde la timbul rasa2 marah atau tension.  Apa nak tension2 lak...orang lain yang kawin, kan.  Tension; bukan sebab orang tanya or sebab adik2 dah kawin.  Tension; sebab sometimes i find it more difficult to communicate with certain people.  Mungkin sebab orang tua; or perhaps sebab i yang semakin tua...hahahha

Frustration

I have lots of frustrations in life. Dari kecik sampai tua ni macam2 benda jadi, good and bad things. Some are not within control, some are just meant to happened.


While on previous, previous post I did mentioned about my satisfaction when the atlas is almost done; sebenarnya it's not. We were supposed to get it ready for the conference, somehow it's not. I don't blame myself for it. I did my part and the rest are the bosses' decision. I'm quite disappointed because I spent hours cracking my head to finish it on time.


I had sort of an interview yesterday. It wasn't meant to be an interview, I was told that it is just a "get-to-know" sort of meeting. I did badly. I bukannya nak cover2 whatsoever, it was bad. I wasn't mentally prepared to be questioned by 5-6 people from that company at the tower. Am I sad that most probably I won't be selected? Not at all. But, I have a little bit of guiltiness since it doesn't only involve me, it's also concerning others.


You know that kind of feeling when someone shares their problem; you wanna do something to help, but there's nothing u can actually do other than just listen, and your occasionally "ooo", "laaaa...ye ke?", "hmmmm" and many other sounds that u wish could make the situation better.


I wonder if there's any therapy for all the frustrations. I eat. And I can really eat in those times...hehe

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p/s :  the post was written via henpon; mind the fullstops, gaps, comma etc :)

p g c e 2 0 1 1

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Live from the event hall...hehehe

satisfaction

I was reading a post by a blogger when i realized that her choices of song at her mixpod itu selalu menepati my citarasa.  Maybe sebab kitorang ni sebaya kot.  Kanak2 seperti me_cnor, cikSecretary dan pnAcc memang confirm takkan enjoy lagu2 tu.  PK pun mesti tak minat punya, maklum la, dia kan lebih berumur...hahaha.  Anyway, sambil berjiwang2 tumpang dengar lagu orang ni, baik la i hapdate sikit.


I'm in a midst of finishing a project which started almost a year ago.  My input bukannya besar mana pun, tak penting pun.  It's a book, an atlas.  I'm supposed to put together everything in place, with my own creativity yang tak seberapa ni.  I love doing it, walaupun sebenarnya idak le canggih mana output dia tapi since i did it from scratch, so when i look at the test print sample, rasa syok gila, rasa macam nak sengih dari telinga ke telinga.  When i flipped the pages, baru i sedar yang i tersalah bagi file kat apek tu, it wasn't the latest updated version.  But it didn't spoiled my excitement, tak sabar rasa nak tayang kat opis.


Kenapa yang i beria sangat?  Kalau nak diikutkan, bukannya ada tulis nama i pun dalam buku tu.  Bukannya dapat apa pun.  Takde sapa pun tau what's my contribution.  No one knows why i chose this photo instead of that, no one knows that some maps and most of the diagrams are drawn, bukannya simply cut & paste dari mana2.  So, after all the hardwork, di saat2 last ni i memang agak degil sikit especially when the comments i received adalah melibatkan benda2 cosmetic je.  I was very open during the whole process, i was hoping to get some constructive comments from the beginning, kalau sekarang baru nak gitu gini benda2 remeh sori la i nak layan, lain la bab2 technical kan.  Anyway, i've learned something valuable.  Satisfaction.


Setiap orang ada cara masing2 untuk rasa puas hati.  Ada orang senang nak satisfy dengan apa yang dia buat, ada orang cukup cerewet.  Ada orang, pakai baju kelawar dengan selipar dah boleh jalan sampai Tesko.  Ada orang, kena pakai gaun kembang lipstik merah mata biru mascara bagai dengan kasut tumit baru boleh keluar rumah.  I think i'm in between both.  Not easy to be satisfied, but not expecting too much perfection.  Everything needs to be aligned - yes, but if  left aligned looks better, then it doesn't have to be justified.  Kalau pakai sandal lebih selesa, kenapa perlu paksa diri terkedek2 pakai heels walaupun kekadang teringin jugak nak berangan tinggi cam model kan?  Kadang2 imperfection  lah yang menyebabkan satu2 benda tu unik, menarik and ada nilai seni & kreativiti...cewahhh!  PK, i know u have something to mengumpat about this!


The truth is, i think when you do things yang melibatkan imagination and creativity,  it is best that you do it on your own without constant interference from anything or anyone.  Contohnya, kalau kena buat hantaran, you wouldn't want someone else to buy the flowers etc; sebab, nanti orang tu beli bunga kaler purple, manik kaler gold, padahal what you've already drafted in your mind is a yellowish theme.  Tak ke lari tema tu?  If it's not your wedding, maka boleh la tahan lagi kan; if it's yours?  


When involving others (especially yang berumur), it is hard to express your own idea, especially if it's not the norms.  You may think that right aligned paragraph might bring fresh look to your idea, tapi jangan harap la senang2 orang nak terima.  You may want to put huge, gigantic flowers yang saiz setiap kuntum lebih besar dari kepala sendiri as decoration on your table; what do you think makcik2 akan kata?   Tak sesuai la, tak cantik la, tak pernah orang buat la... Yes, it might look weird, memang takde orang buat, mungkin jugak tak sesuai; but, why not give it a try?  Give the freedom.  Kalau cantik, kita pun boleh buat jugak; kalau nampak hodoh, at least semua orang dah puas hati, kan? 


We are all restricted by the 'norms'.  Apa yang lain dari kebiasaan tu tak semestinya tak elok.  Let loose of yourself.  Some people are also bound by perfection; but I think too much perfection kills our creativity.  In the end, what we really hope is true satisfaction.  Apa ada pada nama; there's something deep inside of you, the thoughts of it would bring smile to your face... that, is satisfaction.

cerita orang lain

Imagine this.  A single mom with three teenagers, has a few male chatting friends, and is dating/meeting those men.  Anything wrong with the picture?


Nothing is wrong since she's single.  She has her right to chat with anyone; male or female.  She might be lonely; let's assume that all her kids are grown up, living elsewhere or studying, so she needs someone to talk to.  She's free to date or meet anyone.


But, what if the men she's dating are married?  Ask me and my answer is 'no'.  She has no right to date any man who has wife and children waiting at home.  She has no right to act like teenagers, to meet any man in the middle of the night, to take couple photos or to get excited about the date.  That's all meant for teenagers, for her children.


I'm a bit traditional bab2 cenggini.  I won't let myself mess up dengan laki orang.  If i have kids, i won't let my kids watch me giggling over the phone macam budak2 tingkatan satu baru belajar subjek sains.  What if diaorang rasa keluar malam and balik after midnight is not wrong, regardless dengan kawan laki atau pompuan.  What if the photos i took terlepas kemana2.  Who knows, henpon tu terhilang ke, yang jumpa henpon tu pulak sepupu kepada bini laki tu.  Buatnya tangan dia gatal godek2 gambar dalam tu.  Buatnya dia tunjuk kat bini orang tu...ohhhh, that's too much to imagine.


I don't understand.  Sometimes i think single ladies would have better judgment than single parent.  Single ladies mean single la kan, yang tak pernah and not currently mempunyai husband.  I'm not saying all of them behave the same, i know some are good, devoted mom.  Cuma lately, macam selalu je terjumpa (terjumpa kat pesbuk, terdengar, terjumpa face-to-face ...etc) dengan perempuan macam ni.  Adakah once you have a husband maka if your husband leaves you maka macamana sekalipun you need to have a man with you?  Does flirting satisfies your needs?  Ataupun it's a kind of revenge?  Maybe you need to show off to your ex bahawasanya you masih lagi laku?  I think that's the main reason kot.  Mungkin sebab rasa sakit hati kena tinggal, especially if kena tinggal sebab dia ada perempuan lain.  So, untuk puaskan hati sendiri, or more likely to prove to your own self that ada laki lain yang boleh ganti tempat dia.  Well, why not?  Kalau betul yakin that you'll have delightful life ahead dengan adanya sorang laki, then go ahead.  Tapi, boleh tak don't act as if you are 17, and please be a little bit choosy, jangan la husband orang...


Siapakah yang i maksudkan?  hahhahaa.....  ada la !!!

baked, baking

I used to love baking.  Sila take note...past tense tu tau.  I remembered the first time i baked was when i was in standard 3, or maybe 4.  We were preparing to go somewhere or maybe preparing for something.  Disebabkan my mother tak sempat nak buat segala benda sendiri, maklum la, adik2 pun kecik lagi maka i was ordered to hold the mixer (we don't have stand mixer at that time) for the first time.  Since then, maka whenever she wants to bake, i'll help her prepare the ingredients, the baking pan etc sampai la i boleh buat kek sendiri from A to Z.  The only cake we made at that time is marble cake or as we call it, kek belang bodoh.  The cake is not 'stupid', cuma looking at the various fancy cakes we have nowadays, that kek belang seems tersangatlah ordinary.


Starting from that moment, setiap kali nak buat kek maka i'll be the one in charge.  I had no other choice, kena jugak buat sebab kalau tak sapa lagi nak tolong kan.  I started to venture into other kind of cakes.  Jumpa je resepi kat majalah i akan cuba. Tak pernah pulak rasa takut kek tu tak habis sebab apa benda pun yang dibuat kat rumah tu mesti habis.  Even until now, agaknya kalau buat kek bubuh rempah kari pun habis agaknya.


My mother rajin buat kuih untuk minum petang.  That was dolu2, zaman dia rajin, zaman kitaorang semua kecik2 lagi.  Sekarang dia masih lagi buat but not regularly.  Dia sangat suka buat kuih berulang2 kali.  Musim dia buat kuih apam, maka berhari2, berminggu2 la kitaorang kena makan apam.  Time kat rumah ada banyak pisang, maka berhari2 la kitaorang kena makan benda berasaskan pisang.  But the good thing is, dia rajin mencuba, and i think dulu2 (perlu ditekankan...dulu2 tau), i jugak rajin mencuba sebab dia tak pernah kesah kalau apa yang kita buat tu jadi ke tak.  Percaya tak, i dah pandai kelim karipap masa skolah tadika tau...hahahha.


Kitaorang pernah tinggal kat Jasin.  It was a small town at that time, sekarang pun kecik jugak kan.  At that time cuma ada satu je pasaraya, itu pun kalau zaman sekarang ni kita panggil kedai runcit je kot.  My mother teringin sangat nak buat pie.  Of course la kat Jasin tu takde jual pastry margerine.  We went to bandar Melaka, pun takde jugak jual.  It was really frustrating.  So, throughout the years we live at Jasin tu, takde la boleh kitaorang makan benda2 fancy sikit.


Berbalik kepada topik baking tadi.  I saw a carrot cake recipe in the newspaper.  Gambar kek tu tersangatlah menarik.  Tetiba rasa macam berkobar2 pulak nak buat kek tu.  I bought all the things needed.  I went from the bakery supplier to the Gergasi, to Tesko sampai dua kali sebab i lupa barang yang nak dibeli.  I planned to do it at home, tapi tak jadi sebab i tak tau mana peginya penimbang, nak main agak2 je cam tak best plak.  So, lepas pegi rumah PK, off i went to my parents place.


So, inilah hasilnya.  Doesn't look very impressing kan, but believe me, sedap tau....hahahha!

home to office and back home again

atas hiway yang jam

sunrise from the expressway

nampak tak satu per tiga klcc in between?

once the tallest building

ala2 avatar tak lampu rambu2 tu? ..hehe

sunset when i reached home

saya sangat marah

Today is Monday, and it's okay if i'm not in the mood to be extra nice.  In fact everybody is not in their 'bestest' angin when it's Monday kan?  Things that bug me today :


1 : Why is my computer super slow?  Not only today, but it's been slowing down my work all this while.  Maklum la free space kadang tu less than 1Mb...boleh?  What else can i delete from the machine? Semua software/file nak guna...

2 : I tengah marah dengan my own makcik sekarang ni.  She's into this network marketing ke hapa.  Suka dia la kan dia nak join apa benda sekalipun, nak jual juice ke, nak jual piring kaca ke, nak jual ranting pokok pun i tak kesah.  Tapikan, boleh tak jangan sepah2kan my pesbuk wall?  Or worst still, boleh tak jangan cakap as if whatever u are doing is the best job in the world and kalau orang lain taknak join that thing u are doing tu semua orang macam tak guna and tak berfikiran jauh whatsoever?  I don't mind the selling part, bagus la kalau u rasa benda tu boleh menambahkan pendapatan ke, if it makes u or anyone else jutawan ke; but, have some sensibility.. sell your things, but don't criticize others.

3 : rasa nak marah tengok muka MatBlurr hari ni.  I remembered the day when he told me that bos baru dia suruh dia tukar tempat; padahal we came to know later that sebenarnya dia yang mintak dari bos baru dia nak tukar tempat.  Apa? Ingat we all ni heran sangat ke kalau dia nak tukar tempat tu... ceria sikit tempat tu kalau dia takde.  Tipu tu yang buat i marah, bukan sebab dia nak pindah tempat tu.

4 : Kenapa la Golumn ni asyik ulang-alik ke depan belakang.  Tau la dia ada kat opis hari ni, takyah la nak tunjuk dia ada.  Kacau tauuuuu!!!!

5 : i am sooo, very, very angry with mc#1 for not replying my messages and calls padahal dia yang kata nak call and nak datang.  This is not the first time he didn't return my messages, or ignore janji2 manis sendiri.  I tak pernah kesah pun, i never initiated any appointment, never bother to ask pun kalau tetiba dia cancel; but this time i am the one who needs his help.  I called and smsed sebab bos i nak mintak tolong.  Bukannya i nak tergedik2 ke apa.  ....Kenapa la i berkawan dengan makcik2 ni...


Hope the rest of the day will be better...hehehheheeee!!!

new year

I intended  to post something about New Year.  Tapikan, memandangkan mood yang suam2 kuku gitu, maka terpaksa la post ni di postpone beberapa kali.  Kena jugak tulis something sebab nak lawan me_cnor yang bertubi2 mengomen & menghapdate (azam tahun baru kah?)



I never had any resolution before.  Kenapa? Entah la.  I coudn't stick to any kot.  Di kala orang lain sibuk dengan azam2 tahun baru; nak rajin keje, nak jaga badan, i masih lagi terpinga2 macam tahun2 sebelum ni.  What had i achieve tahun 2010 ? Let me see...

1 : i berjaya menjaga status sebagai ibu kepada 18.  Not really a good mom, but at least i know my duties.  And they've been great companions, walaupun kekadang ada jugak menimbulkan rasa marah dan huru-hara di sana sini. 

2 : walaupun status diri tak berubah, i berjaya hidup dalam keadaan emosi yang tenang & aman damai despite the fact that orang lain seme status dah berubah2.  Kalau isi borang tu dah macam2 la kena isi bak katanya.  I'm really greatful for this 'gift' sebab kalau tak, musti hidup i akan gundah gulana memandangkan rakan2 sebaya dah hampir menyambut menantu, kita pulak duk sibuk terkinja2 sana sini mencari boipren (contoh je ni...not me ye!).

3 : lupa lak...my status berubah sikit.  I'm an aunt...hehe.

4 : seriously, is that all???


I want to have a good start for the year.  Something fresh, something new, something to boost my energy and spirit.  Shall i not visit Tesko every weekend anymore?  Tak boleh... makanan budak2 bawah tu kena jugak beli.  Should i stop visiting every other mall, supermarket etc?  Tak boleh jugak.  What shall i do di hari2 minggu?  Takkan nak duduk diam2 je mengadap tv & mendownload cerita, i still have to go out and eat kan.  Besides, even if i really, really, really do not feel  like going out, mesti ada je sesapa yang tepon.  Nak ajak makan la, nak ajak gi beli manik la, nak beli loyang la, dah pesan kat orang tu suruh beli...dia tak belikan la... So, makcik ni jugeekkk la yang kena suruh kan.  Kenapa la tak habis2 diskriminasi terhadap orang2 yang tak kawin ni?  hahahaha....


New addition to my boring life sempena tahun baru ni :

1 : I got myself a new toy on the first day of the year.  Something yang bagi orang lain mungkin cuma 'elehhhhh' je, but i gave it a seriously, serious thought takut membazir if i don't fully utilise it.  Bila lagi nak pamper diri sendiri after all the hard work. Don't i deserve something without being guilty?  hmmmm...so far, it's perfectly fine & i have no complaints walaupun mc#1 bermati-matian tak approve dengan my decision tu...tak kesah pun!

2 : I've also changed my telco provider after almost ten years with the previous one.  Good-bai meksis, i'm now with the yellow creature...hehe.

3 : I planned to get rid of my credit card & change it to a new one.  Pilihan hati dah ada but i don't have the time yet nak gi usha2.  The reason for changing is i'm bored with the current bank...mmmmm.

4 : oooohhhh come on! i'm no different from any other human.  I dream of many, many other new things.  Kete baru ke, camera baru ke, perabot baru ke... paling best kalau dapat rumah baru, tepi pantai, takyah keje....uuuuuuuhhhhhhhh....