I haven't been writing for a while. So many things had happened since then. PK came back, SJ dah boleh jalan, my sister gave birth to a baby boy who was given a name similar to SJ's, someone yang i dah lama kenal is suddenly sick, a family cat is dead...i have a lot to list down.
It's all about effort. We will never have enough time. We will always have excuses. Lame excuses. I've made many, many attempts to write. I have many drafts, but none were posted...sebab, they are all half way done. Takde satu pun yang complete.
Sometimes we think that we've done enough, padahal apa yang kita buat tu cuma la seciput. Sometimes we think that we've not done enough, padahal dah terlebih2 pulak. Tetiba teringat kat pintu pagar masuk aka pondok pakgad kat luar tu. Tak cukup dengan atap macam nak lalu kastam, sekarang tambah pulak dengan signboard besar gabak macam nak masuk pusat jagaan orang2 tua. I memang hari2 panas hati je lalu situ. But i love my house. I love the view from where i'm sitting right now...which is, on my bed, facing the window where i can see lights from buildings far, far away. The windows on my left face the hill. The windows and balcony is located in a very strategic place, where i do not have to face any other resident. Sangat sesuai untuk orang2 yang anti sosial like me.
Okay, back to the topic... errr...ada topic ke pun? Anyway, just to keep myself reminded - (i know one day i can rely on my updates to keep me reminded on many things...) i came back from umrah on 22nd April, about 10 days ago. It was a trip with my parents, aunties and uncle from my mother's side, plus 2 cousins. I'm having post effect from the extremely hot weather; demam, selsema, batuk, rashes...but it's the experience that keeps me smiling to myself everyday. I've never really told anyone about the trip; not as much as i often did. Only part2 yang mengumpat2 dengan PK je la kot...haha. Not that i don't want to tell, it's just that i don't know how to explain the feeling. One may say, 'alaaa...apa la yang susah sangat nak cerita' or 'ishhh...toksah la emo sangat kot...' but the truth is; the whole trip is about handling your emotions, changing your routines, habits etc. And how can it not be emo?
It was really an emotional moment the first time i saw Kaabah. I wish the time would stop there and then. I wish i could capture that moment. You know, after all this while kita cuma pandang gambar kaabah kat sejadah, this time it's right there in front of you. Serious rasa sebak...and the emotions was carried over while performing tawaf. It was about 2am, so tak ramai orang and the circles wasn't far away from the centre. You can really feel betapa kerdilnya berdiri kat depan tu, with so many things to ask for. I nak cerita banyak2 pun tak reti jugak...kena rasa sendiri la kot.
Hehehee....i just got another moment i wish i could capture just now. I was watching Azura on my laptop (ye...azura ye...!) when my phone alarm rang. Guess what? It's 3rd May, 00:00 hrs....wahhh!!! So much blessings on me...Alhamdulillah :)
